Ok, firstly, my apologies if this is mis-categorized, it likely is, but the
classification system isn't the clearest..

I don't use a fully Gnome desktop. Instead, i use WindowMaker. However, i am
always running some gnome/gtk app or other. For example, i prefer gnome terminal
for my term, and i always have two or three gnome-terminals open at any time.

If i choose to not run the gnome settings daemon, gtk/gnome apps are un-skinned
and ugly, and things such as icons in Nautilus are absent. If i do run the
settings daemon, it gives me skinned apps with nice icons and such. 

Trouble is, if i run the settings daemon, it tries to override other things in
my desktop that i didn't ask it to, including key bindings, and my desktop
background. It got me so infuriated that i renamed the binary to disable the
settings daemon. 

I know i can apply a theme using a ~/.gtkrc-2.0 file and an "include" directive,
however this does not provide icons, or many other features. I really like
Nautilus, and would use it but for the fact that without the settings daemon all
the icons are the generic "page" icon. 

I'm sorry, but it's more of a hassle than it ever used to be to run gnome/gtk
stuff compatibly on a non-gnome desktop. :(

BOTTOM LINE: Everything that the settings daemon manages should be optional (eg,
"don't manage x or y!"), and the daemon should be designed in a manner mindful
that it may not be running on a fully gnome desktop. Thank you.